Alcoholic? How to deal with them and how to help?

My ex-partner has ad rink problem... is there light at the end of the tunnel? Am i doing the right thing by pushing him away? Is it better to be cruel to be kind?Alcoholic? How to deal with them and how to help?
Looks like we are in the same boat, except I am still married to him. I tried to get away, but he got so bad after I left him that I felt sorry for him and let him come live with me. Needless to say he still has his drinking problem and I have just become numb to the issue. Honestly, he 100% loves you and your child more than anything even alcohol. Alcoholism is a disease, an addiction, its hard to break free. You cannot help him unless he wants to help himself. I think your right in your decision to leave. Its sad but he has to hit bottom before he realizes he definitely needs help.Alcoholic? How to deal with them and how to help?
He is your ex and if he is in denial about his problem, there is nothing you can do to change that.



Edit: Change phone number and do not let him interact with your 3 year old child ! I think a massive intervention is necessary for your child's sake ! What can he possibly learn from a father like him? Think about it !!
It depends what problem you are trying to solve - his alcohol problem or your having to deal with him.

Pushing him away just means he will go and be an alcoholic somewhere else. There are plenty of resources to keep alcoholism in control, such as Alcoholics Anonymous.
You are right to stay away from him if you don't want to be around an alcoholic. There's not a lot you can do for him, he has to seek the help himself. You're not being cruel. You are teaching him there are consequences to his alcoholic behavior. You're more likely doing him a favor. People who act like there isn't a problem and stick around alcoholics are not doing them any favors.

And yes, there is light at the end of the tunnel if HE wants help. Consider al-anon. It is for people who have loved ones who are alcoholics. I wish you luck.
He is you ex-probem. Keep pushing him away and continue to push until he is totally pushed out of your life. Don't look back...move on.
have you ever heard of alcohol Annanimous

but I can only tell you it is not your place to help him, he is the only one that can help himself
You can't help them, they have to help themselves. There may be light but it is far far away and most don't ever manage to find it.You are doing the right thing.
My late husband was an alcoholic. It was a difficult marriage. I asked him to leave, he committed suicide shortly after. He had BIG issues.



You are NOT being cruel to have pushed him away. You need more stability for your young son. Move on and don't look back and don't allow him to see the boy under any circumstances when he is under the influence. Let him take you to court for visitation and tell the Judge what the deal is. Keep a journal too in case you need it in court for the future. Make sure you enter the time, date %26amp; accurate details.



Mary in Camde, MI
well i would not keep the kid from seeing his father,as long as he is sober when he sees him.but as for him getting sober,well he needs to step up and do something,you cant help someone who doesn't wanna help themselves.so stand your ground and see what he does.but don't wait to long,maybe a few months tops.
I think you have to push him away for the sake of your child. He wouldn't be a great role model for him at what is an influential stage of his life either! Try and catch him when he is sober and tell him to sort his life out if he wants to see his child as at the moment he cannot be trusted with him. Could you have this conversation with a member of his family? Tell him nothing will come of him turning up on your doorstep drunk as that will not get him access to the child but as and when he can prove himself to be sober, he will get access again. Good luck